Saturday, September 8, 2018

A Tale Of Two Funerals

This week was one of those weeks that every pastor dreads. I was called to lead three funeral services in a period of six days.  The first two were for "members" of our church (more about that later) and the third was for a young man who I had known since he was a high school classmate of my oldest son.  This fellow (age 45) had suffered a debilitating stroke five years ago and had been the resident of a nursing facility ever since.  My heart goes out to his sister, who is now the last remaining member of her family.  He had lived in Cincinnati for many years and his sister is in Bethlehem, PA. so obviously, they were not members of our church, but good personal friends, nonetheless.

The two funerals I want to focus on for the purposes of this post were for the two whose published obituaries listed the deceased as members of Westmoreland Baptist Church.  I define a church member as a born again, scripturally baptized, individual who embraces the local church through regular worship attendance, fellowship with other believers, involvement in discipleship ministry, regular proportionate giving to the ministry and mission of the church, and taking part in at least one ministry of the church.

The first of the two individuals I am speaking of, along with his spouse were long time, active members of Westmoreland Baptist Church. He had been saved and baptized as an adult in the 1970's. Those who knew and worked with him witnessed the powerful change Christ brought about in the life of this man. Over the years he had served the church in various capacities including the office of Deacon. His wife has taught in our former PreSchool ministry and has taught 1-3 grade Sunday School for longer than I have been at this church.  They almost never missed a Sunday Morning worship service, and I smile when I remember him always smiling and waving at me from his perch on the front row center section of the balcony!  Although my practice is never to see the personal giving records of anyone in our church, I am advised that this couple gave regularly and generously to the work of the church.  Their love and personal encouragement for this pastor goes beyond what I can express.

The other "member" is someone who also joined this church in the 1970's.  Church records indicated that this individual went on "Inactive Membership" status (a misnomer I will address later in this post) in 1993.  That is 9 years before I came to serve this church in 2002.  I can probably count on both hands (with fingers left over) the number of times this individual attended worship services in my 16 years as pastor.  Our financial secretary, upon my request, told me she had no record of giving for this "member". No participation in any ministry of our church and not present or involved in any discipleship growth efforts. Even though this person was on inactive status since 1993, there were numerous times that I was requested to come visit at their home and on occasion in the hospital. There were also intermittent requests for various types of assistance, including home repairs - which we tried to help with, and sometimes referred to agencies who could assist better than we could.  The attitude expressed in return was something akin to "What have you done for me lately?"

I had been told by this person on several occasions that "This church doesn't care about me" even though we had attempted to minister to this person numerous times - even though they had chosen to have little, or nothing to do with our fellowship.  Even with assistance we did provide from time to time,  they often spoke badly of our church in the community.  On the last occasion one of our church members encountered this person, this other  "member" said angrily, "I'll never step foot in that church again!"  Yet, when news came of that individual's death, the person was listed in the newspaper obituary as a member of our church. The family carried out the written instructions of the deceased to have the memorial service in our sanctuary, and that I would do the funeral.  They had even left scripture reference for me to read.    

Naturally, I attempted to minister to this family in their time of loss, and shared the gospel at the funeral service, to those who were in attendance - many of whom I did not know.

The purpose of this comparison is not to praise someone and disparage another.  Each of these people were created in the image of God and are entitled to the dignity that goes with that.  However, there is a vast difference between these two, who were both listed as "members" of Westmoreland Baptist Church.

Our church has a Membership Committee which faithfully updates our membership list into several categories. There is an "Active" membership list; a "Homebound" list, an "Inactive" list, and a "Non Resident" list.  The Non Resident list had been created with a good purpose. It would include military personnel stationed in another area, students away in college, folks who were temporarily deployed to other areas by their employers and even missionaries on foreign fields.  These would be people who were otherwise "active" members of the church, who were temporarily distanced from us due to circumstances beyond their control.  However, over the years it has also morphed into folks who have permanently moved away, but never complied with the agreement in our church covenant that they would promptly "seek to unite with a similar church" in their new location.  This is a problem that needs to be fixed, but my larger problem lies with the "Inactive" membership list.

I'm sure our fore bearers included this category, with the idea that erring and missing church members could be ministered to, and hopefully restored to fellowship.  This is a noble goal, consistent with scriptural teaching, and something that every church should do when these unfortunate situations occur.  My problem with this category is the entire concept of an "Inactive Member".

It is an oxymoron!

One who is not connected to the body and not involved in it's functions is NOT a "Member" of the church. If there is one more thing I would like to see accomplished  before my time of service here is done is to do SOMETHING about this category.  When our clerk reads the membership status in our quarterly business meetings there are as many "inactive members" listed, as there are "active members". 

What is wrong with this picture?

My proposal is two fold.
1). Find some new nomenclature for that category, ie. "Out of Fellowship"  "Missing in Action" etc. 
2). Go back to what I am sure was the original intent - to seek to minister to and restore to the fellowship.  However there needs to be an actual effort to do just that, and a time limit (perhaps six months to no longer than one year) to either accomplish restoration, or to remove those names from our fellowship. Our Lord cannot be pleased with a long list of names of people who desire to "keep their names on the book" yet are missing from the body,  it's work, and it's fellowship.

Obviously, these things are an internal matter that the "active" members of WBC need to deal with.  My purpose today is not to air our laundry to the public, but for the purpose of this post is just to remind readers that, if you identify yourself as a member of a local church - then be a "member" indeed!                       

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