According to the national "averages" I should not have lived to see this 57th birthday. That's because on the news that I received on the last week of November, 2004. There was bad news and worse news. The bad news was that I was diagnosed with cancer. It was colon cancer - which was bad news. The worse news was that it was in stage four - having already escaped the colon and had metastasized to the lymph nodes and the liver. The prognosis was "incurable but hopefully manageable" through chemotherapy.
Those of you who know me personally or who have read my blog before know that the doctor told me that the average survival time for my type of situation was 18-22 months. Pretty sobering news. If you have never heard the "incurable cancer" diagnosis for yourself or a loved one - take it from me - it'll make you think about a lot of things. There are three or four ways you can deal with that kind of news:
- Despair and surrender
- Bitterness and anger
- Determination to fight it with all you've got - or
- Turn it over to God
I chose the fourth option. It suddenly occurred to me that NOTHING suddenly occurs to God. In His Omniscience - He knew this was coming from before time began. In His sovereignty, the whole thing was in His control anyhow. He has promised nothing but good for me and has known the plans He has had for me all along (Jeremiah 29:11). Having an excellent, capable and caring oncologist locally, and the Great Physician on duty around the clock I did three things. I was anointed by the elders of the church and they prayed for me with the laying on of hands (James 5); I prayed for wisdom for Dr. Jain; and I determined that it was all in God's hands and that my job was to strap in and take the ride.
It's been quite a ride!
So today, I had the birthday, they thought I would never have. It has been a day of work, rest, and joy. I have received many birthday greetings by phone, email and cards. I sent the usual bouquet of red roses to Mom (which I have been doing on every birthday for the past 15 years or so). The thought occurred to me back then - "Why should I be receiving gifts? Mom is the one who deserves the gift. She gave me life!" Benji, Leigh Anne, and the boys came by the house, as did Mom and Dad for pizza, birthday cake and ice cream. Jay called from Louisiana and I had phone calls from both of my younger brothers. Linda gave me a beautiful card and some thoughtful gifts, and I have just spent some quiet time with God.
So now it's official. I have reached the age of 57. What have I learned in the past 57 years? Actually, I have learned nearly as much in the past three years. I have learned:
- Life is short - Every day is precious
- God has given me a wonderful wife that I do not deserve
- I love Linda more today than the day we walked down the aisle 36 years ago.
- Family is SO important
- I have not only ministered to my church -
- They have ministered to me
- Friends are more valuable than gold
- I have peace with God that cannot be described (Philippians 4: 7)
- It is good for me that I have been afflicted (Psalm 119: 71)
- God's Grace is Sufficient for every need (2 Cor. 12: 9)
- God is good - all the time
- God is in control- therefore -
- Don't sweat the small stuff (and basically it's ALL small stuff)
I want to thank all my friends who have been so kind, helpful and prayerful on my behalf. I want to thank my family for being such a blessing to me, and my grandsons for making my life even richer than before. But above all, I want to thank God for all He has done for me, and for sending His Son to give me forgiveness and eternal life.
Who knows - I may even be around to see number 58 - Or I may get to spend that one with Him.
Either way - It's a wonderful life!
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